Choosing Rest When Every Nerve Says Fight or Flee
10 ways to regulate your nervous system
Recently, I had trouble finding the final draft of an article I had written. I had edited it a couple of times, added the references, and it was ready for submission. However, when it was time to submit it, I found the rough draft, but not the polished version. I could feel myself becoming increasingly irritated and frantic.
When I noticed the shift, I paused and sat down. Took off my shoes and socks. Let my bare feet touch the ground. And I breathed. I breathed intentionally. When things seem to go out of hand, your best bet is to focus on the one thing you can control in the moment.
There are so many things that can push your nervous system into overdrive—plans going awry, relationship conflicts, poor sleep and nutrition, lack of exercise, lack of safe relationships, past or ongoing trauma, and ongoing medical illness.
What is a dysregulated nervous system?
“Your nervous system is like your body’s command center”—it controls everything from your thoughts to your breathing and heartbeat, as well as every sense of taste, sight, hearing, feeling, and smell. It is responsible for every conscious and unconscious activity your body performs.
It has two modes: your sympathetic mode, which is characterized by fight or flight, and your parasympathetic mode, which is associated with rest and digest.
In a dysregulated state, your fight-or-flight response is consistently activated. Your body feels like it’s constantly under attack—even when the danger isn’t physical. And when this happens, your body sends signals to let you know something’s wrong.
Signs your nervous system is dysregulated:
Sweaty hands
Eye twitches or leg jerks
Fidgeting, nail biting
Digestive issues
Excessive tearing
Confusion, brain fog
Snapping at your partner or kids
Road rage
Procrastination, self-doubt
Sensitivity to light, sound, or touch
Heart palpitations
Frequent headaches
Tantrums in children, etc.
In short, your body no longer feels safe, and it tries to get your attention.
A chronically dysregulated nervous system, if left unchecked, can lead to hormonal imbalances, metabolic issues, burnout, or even a full-blown mental health crisis.
So, how do you regulate your nervous system?
If your body keeps sending a fight-or-flight signal, perhaps you’re in overdrive and need to slow down.
Think about it—if a car engine is overheating, you don’t push it harder. You stop. You let it cool. You give it what it needs.
The same applies to your body. Here are some practical ways to bring your nervous system back to center:
1. Ditch Ultra-Processed Foods
Ultra-processed foods are easy to consume, but they dull your body’s natural responses. Try chewing whole foods, such as a carrot or an apple. The act of chewing, tasting, and swallowing reminds your body to be present. Get my wholesome eating guide here for under a dollar!
2. Grounding (a.k.a. Earthing)
Stand or sit with your bare feet on sand, grass, or soil. Let the earth hold you. Feel the texture beneath your skin. This practice can help your body recalibrate and signal a sense of safety.
3. Breathing Exercises
Breathing is primarily automatic, but you can take control of it.
Try the Box Breathing (4-4-4-4) or 4-7-8 technique. Just a few minutes a day can make a difference. Controlled breathing helps calm your heart rate and signals safety to your brain.
4. Hugs and Hand-holding
Affectionate touch is powerful. It releases oxytocin, the hormone that promotes bonding, which helps calm stress.
Here’s how to hug properly: Hold for at least 10 seconds, with arms crisscrossed.
In one study, couples who shared 20 seconds of hugging and 10 minutes of hand-holding before a stressful event showed significantly lower stress markers than those who had no physical contact.
5. Move: Yoga & Stretching
Yoga isn’t just about poses—it’s about control. Stretch. Hold. Breathe. Feel your body.
6. Get Sunlight
Sunlight helps regulate your circadian rhythm and supports vitamin D production, both of which are crucial for maintaining a healthy mood and hormonal balance.
7. Declutter Your Space
Your environment affects your mind. A cluttered space can keep your nervous system in a state of stress. Clear your space, clear your mind.
8. Meditation
Meditation is the practice of cultivating stillness and calmness. Even five minutes a day can help you reconnect with your body and disengage from racing thoughts.
9. Cold Showers
They jolt your system in a good way. Cold exposure can help reset your nervous system and boost resilience over time.
We can’t always control life’s stressors, but we can control how we respond to them. These techniques remind your body that you’re in charge.
10. Prioritize Sleep
Poor sleep worsens your body’s stress response. Participants in the study mentioned above who reported poorer sleep also felt more dysregulated, even after receiving supportive touch. Rest is not optional—it’s medicine. I’ve put together a free book on sleep hygiene to help you. Download it here or forward this to someone who needs it.
Thanks for reading.
Stay hale and hearty,
Dr Nguper
Have you gotten a copy of my DASH DIET guide?
Well written